French kids are learning Shakespeare. From the age of three. How brilliant - but how bad does it make us look? We are rubbish at Shakespeare. Schools have dumped the bard in favour of Eastenders.
Take the lass on Jamie's Dream School the other night who came over all excited when told Shakespeare came from Stratford. "That's where I'm from!" she yelled. No, that's Stratford-on-Avon, not Stratford, north London. More haunt of the hoodie than home of the playwright.
The kids were told they were failures. One found out he was too fat to move. That's telling them. Home truths. Completely out of order, but bang on for all that. This arsey crew are worse than hellish. Don't shout if you can yell is their only rule. One girl who has her tie around her head bandana-style says "Shar arp!" a lot. I think she wants them to be quiet. Jamie's got about six weeks to bring them round, with the help of his expert team. They include Cherie Blair and Robert Winston.
Best of British luck to them. My money's on the French toddlers.
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