Bottoms up! I like a drink as well as the worst of them.Glass of wine at the end of the day? Lovely, make that two. But nothing, absolutely nothing will make me try the latest trend - tampons soaked in alcohol and stuffed up the nose! Whaaat! Just what kind of a look is that?
Seems you get drunk quicker that way. Well cheers mate but no thanks, pass on that one. There's a place for tampons and up the nostril isn't it, though the In-Betweeners reckon they are an excellent answer to nosebleeds. Just how big are those hooters?
Not content, the cogniscenti are sucking up the stuff. Oxy shots they're called and amount to breathing in alcohol vapour. People say don't knock a thing until you've tried it. Facebook folk are trumpeting: "Triple absinthe oxy shot, legendary!" P***** at a stroke, no effort required.Very cheap too.
Perhaps I'm coming at this backwards. I like to savour the stuff, chat, laugh, fall about giggling and give up before I throw up. Get to that stage and the evening's done for, in my opinion. I don't want to start off like that, because, obviously, I'll miss the best bit sleeping it off on a bench somewhere.
How attractive does that sound, loud, legless, a couple of cotton wool plugs with strings adding to the allure. Upside is the lads will fall about laughing, better than the pill. Danger of unplanned sex - nil. If ever there was a case for just saying no...
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