Weddings - which way do you swing? Bang out in front, firing on all cylinders or quietly understated? Frankly, the wads some folk will expend on a single bash never ceases to amaze and appall me. It's almost criminal.
But quietly understated is for job interviews. Show me a wedding and I go for it. Unfettered. Give me fireworks and music and gallons of fizz and a cracking good time. Marshall up the vim and verve by the truckload and then double it. In short, a celebration. Nothing less will do. So out comes the frock.
Last weekend and it's satin and sequins. Peaches and cream. I was not the bride. She, bless her, went for claret crepe, mid-length, elegantly understated. Lovely. Hard on the guests though. Some turned up looking like they were popping into Tesco. Not me.
No Bet Lynch but I didn't hold back. The sequins were few - but they were there, Strapless? I can do strapless without scaring the livestock. And dance? I danced with the tiny bridesmaid and the groom's 82-year-old mum. And anyone else in between. Did I make an exhibition of myself? Possibly. Was I drunk? No, but ask me if I had a good time and I say "fantastic thanks!" because life, like a wedding, is a one-off. Isn't it?
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