My new anti-ageing treatment's going to make me a million this year. Top secret, but let's say but it involves dog hair and the gunk from a newborn's belly-button. Exciting isn't it? I'll whack it all together with a bit of vaseline and then wait for the dosh to roll in.
It's all so thrilling, it just can't fail.That newborn bit is a nice touch. Babes have such wonderful skin, there must be something in it, and where to look but a belly button? Genius, sheer genius.
There's stiff competition. I'm up against pregnant women's pee and ultra-violet blood injections, but I'm quietly confident. After all, why wouldn't it work? Sure to iron out those wrinkles. Injecting your own plasma back into your face sounds pretty attractive, and I may have to do some megga-marketing to beat that one, but there's plenty of dipstick out there willing to give any daft plan a go so why not mine? Anybody got a newborn I can scoop a bit out of?
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